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The Showcase of Depravity

This is the long hard truth. It goes extra deep.

"Comedy's a dead art form. Now tragedy, that's funny." The Showcase of Depravity showcases... depravity. Wisdom and humor from the perspective of a few disgruntled (& sexy) video store professionals.

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Thursday, January 26, 2006

The New Media Wave Uniform

Today Adam, Media Wave's answer to the question "Is there anyone who has bigger hair than Jordan?" (however leaving the follow up question "why?" unanswered), walked in to work today sporting the coolest sweatshirt any of us have ever seen. Not knowing Adam to do or say anything cool until this point, we made a big deal out of it. His inspired outfit was pure ironic genius, especially coming from a suburban jewish kid who works at a video store in the richest county in America.

We (I) decided at that very moment that there was no other option left and we would have to make this the new standard uniform for all Media Wave employees.
Check it out, foo:

This classic hoodie was purchased at Bob's Clothing Store where it hung along side similar shirts and hoodies with pictures of 50 Cent holding a baseball bat and Biggie smoking a fat blunt. These shirts were all located in the Young Adult section of the store, marketed for kids ages 10-16. Nice.

I personally feel that kids have outgrown clothing with simple ideas like beatings, robbery, murder and drugs by the age 13 and should move on to actually beating, robbing, and killing people and doing/selling drugs. In this fast paced modern society we have to keep up with where kids are in their lives. Let's start marketing it for the "Even More Impressionable Youth" section, which actually does exist at Bob's.

Adam also mentioned that he found and quickly snatched the only one of these 50 Cent t-shirts in any size smaller than XXL because the people who buy them wear all their oversized shirts down to their knees - which is an understandable fashion choice because it looks so darn good.

Imagine how funny it would be if the first things customers saw when they walked in the door waz Jay Z sticking 2 gunz in their cracker facez.

It would work perfectly for our new store slogan:

"Media Wave: It ain't your white granny's movie rental store, you whitey cracka bitch"

Here'z another note about the picture on the shirt that'z alwayz bothered me about rapperz: Jay Z is pictured with a big cross around his neck while he'z pointing 2 gatz at some punk bitch. Iz that really what Old Jeezey would do?

So, expect a different attitude from your Media Wave workerz. It will now go from rude and elitist to rude and violent... it's really a natural progression.



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