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The Showcase of Depravity

This is the long hard truth. It goes extra deep.

"Comedy's a dead art form. Now tragedy, that's funny." The Showcase of Depravity showcases... depravity. Wisdom and humor from the perspective of a few disgruntled (& sexy) video store professionals.

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Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Loaded Question

So, I’m pulling a long night at The Wave, and getting a little loopy. But Mort and the Lovely Larissa stopped by, which did indeed help curb my extreme boredom. And while they are here I’m trying to dazzle Brian with my amazing air synth-playing abilities. He was wowed to the point of begging me to join his upcoming synth metal industrial band, soon to conquer the world with their mind bending meld of synth, metal, and industrial. (I’ll be the sole provider of the synth. And the sexy head banging moves. And amazing falsetto vocals.)

Anyway… while there here I get a great phone call.

Me: “Good evening, Media Wave. This is Drew.” (I like to tell people my name because, if they get mad at me, they can pointedly direct their anger. Like, “Listen DREW, I got a big problem…” Then it will go downhill from there. Anyway, that’s not the kind of story I’m telling.)

The Guy on the Phone: “Hello, I was just wondering if you carried homosexual pornography.”

Me: “Uhhhh… no.”

The number on the caller ID said Norwalk, which means he had been calling around, trying to find some good, quality gay porn. I would have offered him some of my own, but I think he might have found it too “extreme.” Oh well. Another disappointed gay porn enthusiast, let down by the fascist regime of Media Wave Video. Fuck. It’s always the little guys (who want to see a guy jerking off into another guy’s mouth) that suffer.

Drew.

4 Comments:

  • At 10:37 AM, Anonymous Em said…

    Maybe it was the mullet guy trying to cloak his identity?? Maybe he's afraid to ask in public, because then everyone will know his secret desires. And when he asks for hard core sex scenes, one should know it's really a code for, "Bring on the queers!"

     
  • At 10:52 AM, Anonymous Chicks Dig Treasure Hunters said…

    I'll say this again since I was in attendance when this happened. Does anyone wonder why Drew knows when you are looking for homosexual porn the typical procedure is to call around to other towns? Because I didnt know this HAHA

     
  • At 3:30 PM, Blogger Jordan, and ya don't stop said…

    my first question to you would be why you are linked to a beastiality site... but thats not really my bizna$$.
    so i dont think drew said he know the proper procedure, he just speculated that since the number came from norwalk that it's what probably happened. However, drew definately does know how to get his hand on porn of any type when necessary. I'm boring some real good shit right now.

     
  • At 2:44 PM, Anonymous Film Cynic said…

    Drew, why didn't you just direct him to the porno store in my building? I've seen you walking out of there so don't pretend ignorance of the fine establishment.

     

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