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The Showcase of Depravity

This is the long hard truth. It goes extra deep.

"Comedy's a dead art form. Now tragedy, that's funny." The Showcase of Depravity showcases... depravity. Wisdom and humor from the perspective of a few disgruntled (& sexy) video store professionals.

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Sunday, June 04, 2006


I think of all many frustrating and stupid questions that we get asked on a daily basis, the stupidest might have to be

"Do you need an account to rent here?"

Maybe I'm just a small town boy living in a lonely world and they do things differently in other parts of the world, but I've never heard of a rental business that does not require you to have an account. Even the library makes you open an account, and the only thing they ask in return for rentals is for you to put up with their bullshit attitudes. (I guess we do the same thing, only we charge you for it. )

In fact, the more I think about the many levels of stupidity that come along with this question, the more I can't understand how someone could possibly ask it. It's the kind of question that you ask in your head and then immediately answer it with the obvious "yes of course! duh! what was I thinking?". But apparently these folks cut out the middle man that is their brain and just go ahead and say any old thing that pops into their head.

Oh well, back to the grind.



  • At 11:42 PM, Anonymous Michelle said…

    What is so funny, is that I would be the person that would ask a question like this. Not because I don't know the answer, but as my way of saying that I am interested in opening an account. Now it might be easier to just come out and say thats what I'd like to do... but thats just too easy for a girl like me.

  • At 7:11 PM, Blogger Cliff Brenford said…

    I think the Reese Witherspoon section question is WAY stupider and weirder.

    I hate to admit it...but I have actually asked that question once before. In my defense, however, it was at a store in NEW YAWK CITY. I am pretty sure there are actuall place in NYC (maybe even Blockbuster) when you can rent without an account. I don't know for sure. But that, coupled with me only wanting the one video (for school) with no intention to rent again, is why I asked. Hey, it was worth asking.

    Do you guys have a French Stewart section?

  • At 9:03 PM, Blogger Radio Free Burke said…

    Looks like your blog readership is all retards. Just kidding! But still it's funny to see you post "The Stupidest Comment Ever" and then have two people line up to say that they would make that comment. Uh...what?

  • At 10:51 PM, Blogger Jordan, and ya don't stop said…

    In response to several questions/comments:

    such is the nature of people. I know that so many people ask that question for a reason... they are mothers, professionals, grad students, worthless writers assistants, what have you... they aren't all totally stupid, they just share a general quality of people that is to ask questions they know the answer to, or to ask questions before thinking about them.

    It's the same kind of thing how I can't possibly understand how everyone and their f'ing cat uses an ATM/Debit card and must use a pin number and therefore they all know that in order for the computer system to process that your number is finished being entered, you must PRESS ENTER. It doesn't automatically know you're finished. It's really simple and the world has come to accept it as a normal follow up to entering a pin, but when they put their pin in at The Wave, the rules change.

    Maybe I'll write a full post about this.

    And to Brendan: I did say "as far as I know" (or something, i'm not going to check... quoting myself is meta, i'd rather paraphrase.. myself.. whoa, meta meta). I had in mind that some crazy stores in NYC might possibly not require membership.

    but still, a general rule that you understand when you work in retail is: EVERYONE is stupid in a store. As soon as you enter you lose your mind.
    Be careful: if you have worked retail before and then you go into a retail store with a friend you normally respect, be prepared to lose all respect for them when you see the idiotic ways they act in the store.

  • At 6:23 PM, Anonymous Carrie said…

    You can rent from places without an account, it just costs more. Vidiots in Santa Monica is the only place i've actually done this. So its not a stupid question, and you're an ASSHOLE, jerk. but i still hate people.

  • At 6:50 PM, Blogger Jordan, and ya don't stop said…

    well there you have it, i guess i was wrong and i'm an asshole.

    however, no where that I know of in CT has this kind of service, and the peolpe who ask this question aren't asking based on past experiences in Santa Monica. Maybe they are, but I'm pretty sure they aren't.

    i've lived in CT my whole life and never heard of this.
    I guess the real point is that I don't understand why you'd be able to rent without an account. I still don't understand how it's possible. How does this Vidiots store know which movie is chcked out and to whom? it's totally necessary for inventory and the service of all other customers to know where your stock is and when it will be back and who has it. I don't see what it costing more has to do with it. We take cash deposits on items if the person doesn't have a credit card, but you still have to open an account.

    Please, explain how this works, otherwise shut your dumb face.


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