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The Showcase of Depravity

This is the long hard truth. It goes extra deep.

"Comedy's a dead art form. Now tragedy, that's funny." The Showcase of Depravity showcases... depravity. Wisdom and humor from the perspective of a few disgruntled (& sexy) video store professionals.

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Thursday, March 31, 2005

Adios Muchachos!

All right boys, I hate to bring down your night and everything, but I'm leaving tomorrow morning. I'm going back to my mother land, Tejas. I'll only be gone for a few days, so the blog won't lack estrogen for too long (which can cause menopause). I'd like to share a few ideas I have about what I'm going to do in Texas: Compete in a rodeo-hopefully as a clown, make it even harder for myself to resist the urge to say "ya'll", go swimming in between rafts at the River Walk, pee on the Alamo, call home from a phone booth and use passers-by singing "Deep in the Heart of Texas" as proof that I actually am in Texas, grow a kick ass mustache that compliments my new sombraro, and give Leslie, the homeless transvestite in Austin five dollars.

So now you know what I'll be up to. I'm going to pretend like you're all crying yourselves to sleep while I'm gone (even though Drew does that every night anyway). Don't worry, there will be a tequila-worm lollipop/ scorpion belt in my bag for all of you when I get home. MWAH!!

None of my exes live in Texas. Thank God.


  • At 10:46 PM, Anonymous Em said…

    I once called home from a pay phone. When I was just in New York City, of all places--but it was from the subway (because I'm a loser, I thought that would be cool). Well, we were with people who had never been to New York before, and because I HAD to call home at that moment, and they HAD to get on the subway at the moment it arrived, we got separated!! Ash waited with me; luckily, Vinnie was with the other people and led them to where they should be.

    The moral of this story:
    If you are ever beginning to feel that the subway car will never come, call your mom from a pay phone. The train will come.



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